comments for essay
Introduction Research has been conducted time and time again about the importance of sleep on academic performance. It is said that sleep is crucial when talking about school work and performance for students. College students specifically go through a transition from high school when they are on a set sleep schedule and veer away from it. This transition might make college students think they can stay up later because they don’t have parents telling them what to do. This leads to the question , is sleep affecting the academic performance of college students? A survey was conducted to see just how many college students feel their performance is affected by sleep. The results of this can be eye opening for college students and their sleep schedules along with their grades and GPA. Greg Voakes , author of the article The Importance of Getting Sleep in College , said that college students need to be getting on average of 8.5...
1) when going back to review your paper, look at the language you use. Try to be more straight forward, instead of being simple.
ReplyDelete2) look through your paper for where you can add commas. I add parts where I felt there should be commas. I try to read my paper out loud slowly, so I can find where commas are needed.
3) you are missing your appendix, so just add that.
4) also look at APA format because the Abstract should be on its own page, along with the references and appendix.
5) I think you have a very strong argument and you explained it well. just to add on, you can try to go into more detail about the effect it has on students. For example, try to find previous studies and add that.
6) your graphs are very strong and give a good representation of your findings.
I think you have a strong paper, good job!
1.) Overall, this essay had great flow from paragraph to paragraph. In addition, I would try to be a little more concise when it comes to word choice.
ReplyDelete2.) The language used is very professional and all of it is utilized well to interoperate the data. Also, all the pages follow APA format but the text is not times new roman.
3.) There are two problems with the layout. You just need to add the appendix and also have the abstract be on its own page.
4.) The research and data used in this essay was excellent. All the graphs were very well described and used in the essay.
Overall, Great essay and very interesting research.